For the past week, the oldest daughter of my host family in Japan, Chie, has been visiting Los Angeles. Unfortunately, I was out of town for most of her time here, but during the time that I was in town, I’ve been taking her and her family (husband and daughter) around Los Angeles. I’m certain that my efforts are still dwarfed by her family’s unmitigated hospitality and generosity that they always extend to my brother and me when we travel to Japan, but I’m glad to at least augment their merriment as much and in any way that I can.
Though I can speak Japanese pretty well, truth be told, my Japanese speaking ability is probably somewhere around an elementary level. Chie’s daughter, Mao, is 3 (almost 4) years old, and so you’d think that I’d be able to converse pretty well with her — a child with a somewhat equally elementary grasp of the Japanese language. NOT SO.
See, the thing is that an adult (for the most part) knows how to temper their vernacular and rate of speech to help someone of lesser language comprehension understand what they want to say; whereas a 3-year-old has no concept of foreigners and other people not understanding their language, let alone their specific “baby-talk.” You can imagine me floundering in the Sisyphean task of trying to entertain a vociferous toddler who, thankfully, didn’t seem to notice (too much) when I would resort to the “just smile and nod” tactic.
Even with Chie, however, things got comical every now and then. Because Chie speaks Engrish sometimes. Which I can’t always understand.
When I was driving Chie and her family back to their friends’ house, Chie was giving me directions on how to get there. Initially, I asked for the address, so that I could just use the GPS, but she didn’t know the address and assured me that she knew the streets and landmarks along the way.
This is about how the conversation went (in Japanese, obviously):
Me: Which way do I go?
Chie: Massugu
Me: ”Massugu”? Um… I don’t know that word…
Chie: Gousuturiito
Me: ”Ghost Street?” Er… I don’t understand… Please speak Japanese, it’s easier…
Chie: Massugu massugu!
Me: I don’t understand “massugu”… Left or right?
Chie: No, First street.
Me: We’re on First street right now…
Chie: Massugu
Chie’s husband: She doesn’t know “massugu!”
Me: I know “left,” “right,” and “in front” — those are okay?
Chie: Yes! Okay! In front!
Me: Okay! Got it!
Chie: We’re close. When you see a hudohowaressu on the right, turn left.
Me: … Can you repeat that one more time?
Chie: When you see a hudohowaressu on the right, turn left, okay?
Me: Uh… what?
Chie: Hudohowaressu?
Me: … OH! FOOD4LESS! Okay! I understand!
Obviously, I know what “Massugu” means now. I am also now aware that “Ghost Street” was “go straight.” Thanks, retrospect (though you’d be more helpful if you could be more punctual next time…).
